I always have so much I want to say to you.
It hasn't been easy, but there has been an enormous number of ups and downs.
Frankly, a lot of both. Who knows, I'd say a tie. 
But as for the downs, when it all sinks in, then I realize how absurd it would be to get all depressed and  hurt and bent out of shape about it all.
But then again, I have very valid reasons.
Everyday why do I feel like a complete fool, sickeningly mortified? "There's more to life than relationships!"
That's very true. Why was it such a fucking realization when she said this? 
Who knows.
Yesterday me and my friend (the one I'm getting over) were joking about how were both gonna be spinsters/cat ladies when we're old and withered and gray and we'll be in a retirement home just living it up...alone.
It was a poignant yet morbid moment.
We saw an old windbag dancing with her cane wearing a multicolored bubushka and H said, "That's gonna be you when you're older!"
Haha probably, is what I thought to myself. 
"And I'll be dancing all by my lonesome," I said mordantly, dryly.
"Oh come on! I'll be too," she said.
"I'm gonna be all alone in the retirement home," I said.
"I will be too," she said.
"Oh come on! Don't even go there," I said.
She's too wonderful to not get swept up by a man. As for me? Lesbians are difficult. Women are hard as fuck. Men are so easy. If I were straight I'd really be getting around, I just know it. 
I can't exactly go out and trolling for women.
Not here.
WEST HOLLYWOOD HERE I COME.